Mishmeres HaSholom – Ask the Rav

Q: Someone offended me badly, causing me tremendous aggravation. I feel a need to discuss the incident with my sister, who I am confident will not pass on any of what I tell her. Am I permitted to share it with her, thus venting my anger concerning the one who insulted me?

A: Make an effort to calm down without discussing your hurt with others. Under normal circumstances you should be able to rid yourself of the distress by investing time and thought in the matter. If the hurt persists, it is permissible to discuss it with a friend or acquaintance who does not know the person who offended you and cannot work out who the subject is. If you’re unsuccessful with all of the above, under certain circumstances you may be permitted to discuss it with your sister on the condition that she doesn’t believe the information and listens just to be meichish — to suspect.


The questions and answers above were taken from the Mishmeres Hasholom pamphlet in Israel. For details and inquiries please email us at office@hasholom.org or call 972-2 5379160.

The views expressed are of the individual author. Readers are encouraged to consult their own posek for guidance.