Proactive Shidduch-Making

Do you know someone in need of a shidduch?

I do, and I’m sure you do too. It may even be your own son or daughter. With bein hazmanim just around the corner, many are eagerly awaiting the influx of yeshivah bachurim and sem girls, and with it, hopefully, lots of shidduchim. Over Yom Tov, parents typically wonder if their children are making a good impression as they wait with bated breath for suggestions to come their way. Husband and wife ask one another, has anyone noticed our wonderful son or daughter? Has somebody approached or called with a proposal? At first, they still pretend they’re not bothered, but with each passing zman and subsequent dry spell, the tension rises, causing a rift between husband and wife and destroying their simchas Yom Tov. Does nobody find our child worthy of a shidduch, they wonder. Is there something wrong with our family/child/bank account? And often, feelings of dejection and despair set in.

Parents! Don’t sit and wait for the phone to ring. Our communities have grown exponentially, baruch Hashem, but the number of shadchanim hasn’t. There’s only so much a shadchan can do, and only so many people she or he can notice. Pick up the phone and make yourself noticed. Be proactive! If you ask any shadchan these days, they’ll tell you that it’s impossible for them to keep up with the huge number of singles and if you want to be remembered, you’ve got to make yourself heard. This has nothing to do with you, with your child, or with your circumstances, it’s just a product of our growing numbers, baruch Hashem, and can be alleviated with your help.

Relatives, friends, and neighbors, do you know how meaningful it is to be remembered? To know that others care enough to think about you and your child? The boy or girl you have in mind may not be exactly what they’re looking for, or may not even turn out to be something they’d like to pursue at all, but make that call! It will take just a few minutes of your time, but it means the world to a waiting parent. When parents feel despondent and frustrated, it can take just one call to imbue feelings of hope and simchas hachaim. And you just never know, your suggestion may actually come to fruition and result in a new bayis ne’eman in Klal Yisrael!

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