Mishmeres Hashalom

Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: Someone offended me badly, causing me tremendous aggravation. I feel a need to discuss the incident with my sister, who I am confident will not pass on anything of…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: At a family simchah, I listened in shock to the gossip of one of the guests. What she said was true, but clearly without purpose, and therefore forbidden to…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: While growing up, we had a steady babysitter in our home. As normal children do, we sometimes misbehaved. I recall that we once shouted at her, “Go home. We…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: While I was sitting on the bus, I overheard a noisy, slanderous conversation between two women who were including the names of the subjects in their discussion. I kept…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: After davening on Shabbos, our Rebbetzin approached me about a woman who was offended by me and had asked the Rebbetzin to discuss the situation with me. She told…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I was sitting and shmoozing with some friends. Suddenly somebody mentioned something negative, but true, about me. I contemplated commenting, “It’s hotza’as shem ra,” and then realized that it…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I graduated from high school 28 years ago and usually only meet my former classmates at simchos. Since we’ve begun marrying off our children, we meet more often, and…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: We were looking forward to the Shabbos aufruf of our future son-in-law. Close to Shabbos, we arrived at the apartment that our mechutanim had arranged for us, and were…

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Telling Others About An Available Apartment

Q: A neighbor asked me if I know of available apartments for her guests for her daughter’s Shabbos sheva brachos. Is it right to tell her about a family I…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I keep up with a handicapped long-time friend from high school. Sometimes, in an effort to lift her spirits — careful not to speak lashon hara — I remind…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I spoke negatively about someone, for a constructive purpose. I did so after consulting a Rav and careful deliberation. Unfortunately, the information reached the subject, who was obviously deeply…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I heard that one of my acquaintances is planning to reveal sensitive information to a friend. In the past, this individual caused me great distress by passing on my…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: I told Reuven specific information regarding Shimon’s family. The information was culled from the popular Interior Ministry website. Eventually I heard that though it wasn’t a secret and his…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: An acquaintance offered my name as a reference regarding a proposed shidduch and when the girl’s family called me I was in a quandary. Though I know the boy’s…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: When people inquire about someone who I know has an obvious external fault, which the other side can see on their own, should I say something about it, or…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: As a shadchan, I’d like to ask a question regarding one of the most unpleasant situations in my field of practice. This happens when one side is interested in…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: Recently, for shidduch purposes, someone inquired about a bachur who lives in my neighborhood and davens in our shul on a regular basis. I promised to look into the…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: When I’m called for information about my friends for prospective shidduchim, I try to accentuate the positive. Sometimes, however, people ask questions about the girl’s traits, e.g., if she’s…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: A relative called me regarding a shidduch for her daughter. Because I am aware of a serious problem in the boy’s family, I postponed my reply by asking my…

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Mishmeres HaSholom: Ask the Rav

Q: In my efforts to help my divorced niece find a suitable shidduch, I spoke to an acquaintance who I thought could be of assistance. Her first question was, “Who…

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